“I have a very beautiful older female beagle that is free to a good home. She is very sweet and has been taken care of very well. Unfortunately she has cancer on her mammary glands and honestly is slowly dying. She used to live at my dad’s house, but currently they are in home transition and my mom, brothers, and I took her in. She’s a great dog, but my mom is really not a pet person. They stress her out. Plus, we are all very busy. If there is anyone that thinks they might be interested PLEASE e-mail me. I do ask that you make sure you are in a position where she truly would be taken care of. I will send pics if you are interested. THANKS so much!!”—
Barbour’s personal values or intentions with his comments aside, I’m just wondering something. Is it in fact true that black people enjoy eating watermelon? Do they eat more watermelon per capita than non-blacks? Why is it an insult to point out somebody’s fruit eating preferences? I’m white and I like watermelon - so if anyone wants to point that out publicly, have at it. I also eat mangoes and blueberries.
I’m Jewish and love bagels - if somebody called me a bagel-eater I’d say “yup, love em! How about some lox while you’re at it”.
“Anyway, Flynn’s fratty son (Garrett Hedlund, who you don’t remember from Troy and Four Brothers) goes into the computer country and has to ride his lightcycle (computer for motorcycle) and have literal cybersex with Olivia Wilde (of The O.C. and House) and probably reconnect with his dad in some kind of emotionally satisfying way.”—
“But out of left field Monday night, the City of Brotherly Love broke up the near-certain pinstriped brotherhood of Sabathia and Lee. Philadelphia pulled another Rocky Balboa and threw one of the most improbable punches in the history of the great American sport known as free agency.”—
“Fast cars, faster women and sexual experimentation: the parties got wilder. Drug abuse — particularly cocaine and hashish — was rife. Evelyn Waugh, embarking on his career as one of Britain’s finest writers, chronicled every excessive detail. He went to a lesbian party where a baronet “dressed first as a girl and then stark naked” danced the charleston while a Russian played a saw like a violin.”—Sex scandal behind Brideshead Revisited - Times Online
My Uncle Mac said he had a suitcase that was always packed. He said a man has to be ready to go at any moment. Jesus, maybe it's a metaphor.
A couple of unconnected thoughts:
1. Once I managed to fall asleep last night (truthfully, anxiety about work is starting to approach the levels I once associated with going back to school after breaks), I had a dream that the Gawker and Videogum commenters went to war. And Videogum won (WHICH IS HOW IT SHOULD BE, PROBABLY).
2. I judge Sarah Palin’s Alaska without having seen even clips of it because I can’t stand to look at moving images of that crazy nutbar woman and her ridiculous trash heap of a family. That being said, I maybe (maybe!) would have been fine with it if it had truly been an exploration of Alaska and how Alaskans live (if you can call that living). But I very much doubt that Kate Gosselin and her entourage of terror would normally go camping in Alaska, so I am now even more done with this show, in that I refuse to even read recaps of it.
3. I’ve taped a Don Draper inspirational quote to my computer screen to help me deal with phone calls to my colleagues in other offices. "People tell you who they are but we ignore it because we want them to be who we want them to be." Alas, as I have no secretaries to fuck and subsequently propose to (SPOILER ALERT [did I do that wrong?]), I suppose I’ll just have to keep on dreaming.
4. My college a cappella group needs to stop e-mailing me. I am done (done-done-dzo-dzo-dzo ooooooh-aaaaaah/vocal percussion interlude) with them — especially after the real sociopath type stuff my fellow ‘06 alums pulled on me this past fall.
The Myth: If you have an alter-ego for whatever insane reason, and it involves dressing in full-body drag, and you happen to double-book yourself for some event(s), and furthermore you then try to attend the event(s) simultaneously as both personalities, you will be successful for a period of at least one hour wherein nobody finds it suspicious that you keep contriving excuses for disappearing into the bathroom or wherever for long stretches of time, and nobody questions how convincing your self-applied drag is because it’s totally perfect.
The Perpetrators:Mrs. Doubtfire, Just One of the Guys, She’s the Man
“Entertainment Weekly reports that “Hey Soul Sister” was the most downloaded song on the music service, with Katy Perry’s “California Gurls” and Eminem’s “Love the Way You Lie” rounding out the top three.”—
“In 1988, she appeared in the NBC television film Goddess of Love, in which she played Venus; fellow game-show personality Betsy Palmer co-starred as Juno. The film was panned universally by critics, with TV Guide joking that White’s acting was “wheely” bad.”—
“LCD Soundsystem, This Is Happening: Putting This Is Happening on your list gives you an opportunity to, once again, tell the story of that one time you and a friend dressed up like Daft Punk for Halloween and carried a boom box that played “Daft Punk Is Playing at My House” on a loop.”—